Sexism in the Workplace

A couple days ago I was working. I work in tourism, so tourists regularly come through and use the facilities. One of the tourists made a big 'mess' on the toilet seat, and the other staff and I were arguing about who had to clean it up.
There is one guy who works with us who told me I should do it because I am 'a girl' and it is a 'girls job'. That was unacceptable. So I told him that he was being unbelievably sexist.
After being called out on it, he apologized and went to clean up the mess. I'm not trying to say that girls should have to clean messes, its just not right that the responsibility gets immediately passed to the women. Especially because my job is to be out in the field while he is more of a 'behind the scenes' guy.
There is sexism in the workplace constantly, even when there is no messy toilet to clean up. Men and women both automatically sort work into what men should do and what women should do based on the type of job.
How many times have women been 'helped' because something is heavy or 'not a lady like thing to do'? Women are just as capable as men, and men are just as capable as women.
I know some guys and girls who say that a woman's job is to stay home to take care of their family and house. That is also extremely sexist. There are a million women who are just as good or better than their male counterparts at certain jobs. So why is it so hard for women to do well in the same position? Why do women have to fight so hard to have the same opportunities? Why do women get congratulated more than men for their achievements?
Treating men and women differently based on their gender is sexism. Sadly, sexism is all over the workplace. Women and men alike can feel the consequences of it. It's time to stop. We need to recognize and call people out on being sexist. And not just the bad things, the good things as well. Why should someone be able to tell a woman that she 'has an amazing job for a girl'? THAT IS SEXIST!!! Any compliment that has something to do with gender is usually sexist. We need to avoid that.
What sexism have you seen in the workplace? Do you think it's okay?

Curing Some Common Misconceptions About Autism

Hello all! I know you don't know me since I'm a guest on this fantastic blog but I thought I would take the time tonight to sit down and talk with you about a topic near and dear to my heart. First let, me tell you a little bit about myself. After all, we're veritable strangers, right?

My name is C.L. McReynolds. I am twenty-five years old.

I am the author of two published novels so far, 'Prophets and Providences' and 'Thaumaturgy', the sequel of which I am currently writing for this year's NaNoWriMo (all of which are available on Amazon for those interested in checking them out! ;) ).

I am a college graduate and a teacher of American Sign Language.

I am an avid reader and fan of fandoms like Supernatural, Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings.

I am currently expecting my first baby.

I am Autistic.

That's right. I have Autism, and not the kind you see on shows like Sherlock and the Big Bang Theory where they're just quirky, eccentric and hyper-intelligent savants. No, I have the meltdowns-in-public-panic-attack-can't-drive-won't-even-go-out-in-public-alone kind of Autism. And before you ask, no, I've never seen and never plan to see Rain Man.

You're probably wondering by now, 'Why on earth are you having a baby if you're that kind of Autistic?'

Well, it wouldn't be the first time I've heard that and I very much doubt it will be the last. Sure, I'm that kind of Autistic but you'll notice that in the little introduction that I gave above, none of those difficulties are there. Sure, I have sensory difficulties and the resulting anxiety that comes with them but I'm also a person with strengths, with skills and with achievements of my own.

Some of you, as you've read this are probably muttering at the screen, 'But you're just bringing another Autistic baby into the world!'

Yes. And?

As you've probably noticed, don't see Autism as quite the same Greek tragedy so many other people do. It's like being in a wheelchair or being Deaf. All come with their own challenges to be overcome and all are people with dignity, honor and self-respect. None of us are tragedies. And, as the chances of my baby having Autism too are quite high, then we'll just be down on the floor playing with Legos and spinning truck wheels together while the same movie plays back to back in the background.

On that note, let me respond to a few of the pretty common questions I receive (usually from perfect strangers and not on a public forum like this. I'm not kidding they will come up and ask me without prompting. Exceptionally rude).

1. No, I am not drawing a disability check. My partner is actually a sergeant in our local law enforcement and I work from home.
2. Yes, I use my voice. I am a verbal individual, especially when strangers ask me this question. No but seriously, when you have Autism, sometimes when the upset crowds your brain, the words get stuck. That's why I learned Sign Language. A great number of my employers and friends are Deaf or sign so I'm never short of socialization in either language. :)
3. I don't, nor will I ever, support Autism Speaks. That's a soapbox I won't get on right now but as an Autistic adult, I say 'no thank you'. Instead, I choose to support the excellent work of advocates such as the Autism Society of America .
4. Yes, I do have some unique special interests. Anything Harry Potter, my own book series (because spending that much time writing a six part fantasy series? It has to be! ;)), anything Diablo (the videogame lol), as well as a few others. That's right, you don't have to have just one.
5. Yes, women can be Autistic too. It's actually being discovered more and more among women simply because before, they had no idea that it presented differently in women than it does in boys. Simply put, a man with Autism and woman with Autism are probably not going to have the same difficulties, reactions, or quirks. Then again, Autism varies widely from individual to individual too so that goes for people as well as genders.
6. Am I high-functioning? I really hate this question actually. I hate it because I've seen what we refer to as “functioning labels” used to discount the opinions and input of Autistic people on all sides of the spectrum. For many, you're either too low-functioning for you to know what you're talking about or so high-functioning that you “may as well not be Autistic at all”. Pretty crappy, huh? Also, I feel like functionality can vary greatly even within a single individual (if you're interested, check out Autistic Regression and Fluid Adaptation to get a better idea of how this happens) depending on different factors. For example, I feel like I'm“lower-functioning” now than I use to be. So my answer to this question is always, “I'm just Autistic.”
7. Yes, Autistic people can have satisfying, fulfilling and long-term relationships with neurotypical people. It may take more work and understanding on the part of both partners but any relationship or marriage does. In the case of Autistic/Neurotypical relationships, I think the biggest thing is going to be patience and communication, whether that communication is spoken, written, signed, in 1337 speak or Silvan Elvish. Whatever works for the two of you (or more if that's your preference) works, no matter how odd it may seem to anyone else.
8. Should you try to correct your Autistic partner or child's “strange” or “embarrassing” behavior? NO! Absolutely not! They are only doing what comes naturally to them! Would you like it if someone told you that you weren't allowed to ever undress in your own home anymore because it embarrassed them? It sounds pretty crazy huh? But some of the odd things that your partner or child may be doing, stimming for example, are merely ways for them to feel comfortable or regulate some internal discomfort. Feel happy that they trust you enough and feel comfortable enough around you to not try and hide behaviors that come naturally to them. Autistic brains are simply wired differently for movement, sound, etc. The only behaviors that should ever be corrected (and only by gently guiding them to a better behavior to replace it) is self-injurious or harmful behaviors. I'm talking physically harmful, not harmful to your social standing in the local Kroger.
9. What are meltdowns like? Well...they're scary sometimes. It's like your entire world gets blinders put on it and all you can focus on is that one hurt, sensation, emotion or frustration until it builds and builds. It builds like the pressure in a broken submarine until eventually the pressure explodes. Meltdowns don't always look like the screaming, flailing scenarios you see on tv. Sometimes it's just uncontrollable, uncommunicative sobbing or you sort of get lost inside of yourself until you lose the ability to connect yourself with anything outside of your own head. You can't think, can't speak, can't do anything until it is over. They do end though, usually after a while but sometimes we need help. A bear hug or something nicely weighted and warm. Sometimes all it takes is someone supportive sitting next to us and tell us it's okay until we ride it out. Maybe you're even that support person in your Autistic's life.

There are so many other topics in relation to this one that we could discuss but alas, we would probably be here for another week or so. So I will leave all of you with the hope that you realize that the Autistic person that may be in your life, the one you see at school or work or the mother struggling in the supermarket with her melting down child (and meltdowns are far different from tantrums) are all people who are deserving of your dignity, respect and understanding, not criticism and derision. We are people, just like you who can thrive and achieve once we have the physical, mental and emotional tools to do so. I hope I've given you all something to think about and I hope you enjoyed learning a little more tonight. Thanks!

-C.L. McReynolds